Microsoft Advertisements from India – Part 3

Let’s see how long we can keep this going.

Shoe and a ride

One night a fellow drove his secretary home after she had imbibed a little too much at an office reception. Although this was an innocent gesture, he decided not to mention it to his wife, who tended to get jealous easily.

The next night the man and his wife were driving to a restaurant. Suddenly he looked down and spotted a high-heel shoe half hidden under the passenger seat. Not wanting to be conspicuous, he waited until his wife was looking out her window before he scooped up the shoe and tossed it out of the car.

With a sigh of relief, he pulled into the restaurant parking lot. That's when he noticed his wife squirming around in her seat. "Honey," she asked, "have you seen my other shoe?"

A Man and Woman Argued

After my husband and I had a huge argument, we ended up not talking to each other for days.

Finally, on the third day, he asked where one of his shirts was.

"Oh," I said, "So now you're speaking to me."

He looked confused,

"What are you talking about?"

"Haven't you noticed I haven't spoken to you for three days?" I challenged.

"No," he said, "I just thought we were getting along."

Letter to Tide

Dear Tide

I'm writing to say what an excellent product you have! I've used it since the beginning of my married life, when my Mom told me it was the best. Now that I am older and going through menopause, I find it even better!

In fact, about a month ago, I spilled some red wine on my new white blouse. My unfeeling and uncaring husband started to berate me about how clumsy I was and generally started becoming a pain in the neck. Well one thing led to another and I ended up with a lot of his blood on my white blouse. I tried to get the stain out using a bargain detergent, but it just wouldn't come out.

After a quick trip to the supermarket, I purchased a bottle of liquid Tide with bleach alternative, and to my surprise and satisfaction, all of the stains came out!

In fact, the stains came out so well, that when the detectives who came by yesterday told me that the DNA tests on my blouse were negative.

Later, my attorney called and said that I would no longer be considered a suspect in the disappearance of my husband. What a relief.

I thank you, once again, for having such a great product. Well, gotta go now, I have to write a letter to the Hefty bag people.

The Living Will

A man and his wife were sitting in the living room and he said to her, "Just so you know, I never want to live in a vegetative state, dependent on some machine and fluids from a bottle. If that ever happens, just pull the plug."

His wife got up, unplugged the TV and threw out all of his beer.